Hi everybody, this is a useful classification of unpleasant personalities which you can use when describing people in your part 2 of the speaking module. Enjoy it.
Here are the worst of the toxic personalities out there and how to spot
them:
1. Manipulative Mary: These individuals are
experts at manipulation tactics. Is a matter of fact, you may not even realize
you have been manipulated until it is too late. These individuals figure out
what your 'buttons' are, and push them to get what they want.
- Why they are toxic: These people have a way of eating away at your
belief system and self-esteem. They find ways to make you do things that you
don't necessarily want to do and before you know it, you lose your sense of
identity, your personal priorities and your ability to see the reality of the
situation. The world all of a sudden becomes centered around their needs and
their priorities.
2. Narcissistic Nancy: These people have an
extreme sense of self-importance and believe that the world revolves around
them. They are often not as sly as the Manipulative Marys of the world, but
instead, tend to be a bit overt about getting their needs met. You often want
to say to them "It isn't always about you."
- Why they are toxic: They are solely focused on their needs, leaving
your needs in the dust. You are left disappointed and unfulfilled. Further,
they zap your energy by getting you to focus so much on them, that you have
nothing left for yourself.
3. Debbie Downers: These people can't appreciate the
positive in life. If you tell them that it is a beautiful day, they will tell
you about the impending dreary forecast. If you tell them you aced a mid-term,
they'll tell you about how difficult the final is going to be.
- Why they are toxic: They take the joy out of everything. Your rosy
outlook on life continues to get squashed with negativity. Before you know it,
their negativity consumes you and you start looking at things with gray colored
glasses yourself.
4. Judgmental Jims: When you see things as cute and quirky,
they see things as strange and unattractive. If you find people's unique
perspectives refreshing, they find them 'wrong'. If you like someone's eclectic
taste, they find it 'disturbing' or 'bad'.
- Why they are toxic: Judgmental people are much like Debbie
Downers. In a world where freedom rings, judgment is sooo over. If
the world was a homogeneous place, life would be pretty boring. Spending a lot
of time with these types can inadvertently convert you into a judgmental person
as well.
5. Dream Killing Keiths: Every time you have an idea, these
people tell you why you can't do it. As you achieve, they try to pull you
down. As you dream, they are the first to tell you it is impossible.
- Why they are toxic: These people are stuck in what
is instead of what could be. Further,
these individuals eat away at your self-esteem and your belief in yourself.
Progress and change can only occur from doing new things and innovating,
dreaming the impossible and reaching for the stars.
6. Insincere Illissas: You never quite feel that these
people are being sincere. You tell a funny story, they give you a polite
laugh. You feel depressed and sad and they give you a 'there, there' type
response. You tell them you are excited about something and you get a very
ho-hum response.
- Why they are toxic: People who aren't sincere or genuine build
relationships on superficial criteria. This breeds shallow, meaningless
relationships. When you are really in need of a friend, they won't be there.
When you really need constructive criticism, they would rather tell you that you
are great the way you are. When you need support, they would rather see you
fail or make a fool of yourself.
7. Disrespectful Dannys: These people will
say or do things at the most inappropriate times and in the most inappropriate
ways. In essence, they are more subtle, grown up bullies. Maybe this person is
a friend who you confided in and uses your secret against you. Maybe it is a
family member who puts their busy-body nose into your affairs when it is none of
their business. Or maybe, it is a colleague who says demeaning things to
you.
- Why they are toxic: These people have no sense of boundaries and
don't respect your feelings or, for that matter, your privacy. These people
will cause you to feel frustrated and disrespected.
8. Never Enough Nellies: You can never give enough to these
people to make them happy. They take you for granted and have unrealistic
expectations of you. They find ways to continually fault you and never take
responsibility for anything themselves.
- Why they are toxic: You will spend so much time trying to please
them, that you will end up losing yourself in the process. They will require
all of your time and energy, leaving you worn out and your own needs sacrificed.
All of these personalities have several things in common. 1) the more these
people get away with their behavior, the more they will continue. 2)
Unfortunately, most of these people don't see that what they do is wrong and as
a result, talking to them about it will fall on deaf ears, leaving you wondering
if you are the crazy one. 3) Most of these people get worse with age, making
their impact on you stronger with time.
Frankly, life is too short to spend your time dealing with toxicity. If you
can, avoid spending mucho time with people who are indicative of these behaviors
and you'll feel a lot happier. Have you encountered these personalities? What
have you done? Any personalities you would add?
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